The Language of Leadership

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Listen to this week’s podcast episode, Ep.195: Effective Communication, Leadership Posture and Engineering Wisdom, with David Bates, using the player below, or click here.

Leadership That Lasts

Leadership isn’t about titles, power, corner offices, or polished mission statements. True leadership, as Dave Bates reminds us this week, is about how we go together from point A to point B.

In this week’s episode of Leading with Integrity, past favourite guest, Dave, returns to discuss his new book: ‘Engineering Wisdom: A Practical Guide to Building Leadership That Lasts’, and to explore what effective communication, posture, and empathy really look like in practical leadership.

With three decades of leadership experience from IBM and venture-backed startups to coaching senior executives, David has seen both the mechanics and the humanity of leadership. His perspective is deeply grounded, refreshingly candid, thoughtful, and people-first.

From Titles to Posture

Many people, David notes, chase leadership through titles ‘manager’, ‘director’, ‘vice president’… believing that each rung up the ladder confers ever greater authority and impact. But leadership isn’t positional. It’s relational. It’s how we bring others along with us.

He calls this leadership posture, and he explains it far better in our conversation than I can hope for in my written word here, but in a nutshell, leadership posture is the mindset, attitude, or stance leaders bring to their work and their every day interactions. It’s not about being in front or behind, but about being present and engaged.

The best leaders, Dave says, are the ones who ask: “How can I help?”

In one story from early in his career, David recalls challenging a general manager after a poorly received all-hands meeting. Instead of reprimanding him, the manager invited him to lunch the next day, asking, “What am I missing?”

That openness, humility, and curiosity left a lasting impression not because it came from power, but because it came from posture.

Communication as a Core Skill

David argues that communication isn’t a soft skill, it’s a core skill. The ability to express, clarify, and check understanding is what makes everything else work.

“People call engineering or pharmaceuticals hard skills, and communication soft skills,” he says. “But the truth is, there is no hard and soft. They’re all skills. And the skills of communicating well are what make all the other things go.” (Paraphrasing slightly there, I hope he won’t mind!)

In his book, he describes a communication framework built on shared understanding. The sender (i.e. the person initiating the message, transmitting the information, giving the talk, etc.) holds responsibility for ensuring clarity and understanding, even when interference occurs. That doesn’t mean taking blame for things outside your control, it means taking responsibility to pause, reframe, and reconnect. He uses the example of a conversation had at a noisy racetrack to make this point, you’re not responsible for the noise level, but you are responsible for pausing until the cars have gone past.

It’s a subtle but profound distinction. Responsibility, not fault, and it transforms the way leaders listen and speak.

Every Word Earns Its Place

One of David’s central lessons is the idea that every word must earn its place on the page. He describes this as a discipline of clarity, a refusal to let ego or verbosity cloud meaning. Even as I write that I’m worrying about how well I’m achieving it in this very newsletter!

In practice, it means slowing down, editing with intent, and asking, “What am I really trying to say here?” It’s not about perfection, which he calls an asymptote, an unattainable goal, but about refining the message until it serves the purpose.

The same mindset applies to email, meetings, or even hallway conversations. As Dave says, you’re never going to have enough time to make things perfect. But it is possible to incrementally improve so that your communication is clearer; and that serves the goal we’re trying to solve together.

Taking Care of Yourself (and Others)

Perhaps the most resonant part of Dave’s philosophy is his view on empathy and self-care. Too often, leaders believe they must choose between taking care of their people and taking care of themselves, but that’s a false choice.

He offers a different framing: How do I best lead? 

Because leadership isn’t about motivation, you can’t motivate anyone, he says. You can only create the conditions for their motivation to thrive or to wither. And those conditions depend on you, the leader. On your energy, presence, and capacity to make space for others. That’s why taking care of yourself isn’t selfish, it’s responsible. Essential maintenance, if you like.

He shares simple but vital practices: set aside time for your own learning and development; invest in coaching or mentorship; and stay connected with peers outside your immediate environment.

“If you’re not progressing as a leader,” he warns, “your leadership will crumble.”

Leading from the Front (the Right Way)

Leadership visibility is another theme we explore through a story about Dave’s former colleague, named Mike. Mike was a senior leader who, when his team was in crisis, didn’t issue orders from afar. He showed up on site, late at night, rolled up his sleeves, and asked, “What can I do to help?”

That, says Dave, is the posture of a leader. Leading from the front doesn’t mean dominating or directing; it means being present, engaged, and willing to get your hands dirty. Mike had a title. But he also had awareness and he was willing to use it to serve his team.

Engineering Wisdom

So why Engineering Wisdom? Because leadership isn’t just art or instinct, it’s a process of building something durable. The book bridges two worlds: the structured thinking of engineering and the human nuance of wisdom.

It begins with reflection, looking back on your experiences to extract the lessons. Then, it offers a framework for turning knowledge into practice, and practice into habits that last.

The aim isn’t to hand you rules, but to equip you to think, adapt, and grow. As Dave says, it’s for both the new leader hungry to learn and the experienced leader feeling burned out. “The goal,” he explains, “isn’t that you read the book and put it on the shelf, but that you do something with it.”

Finally… Leadership That Lasts

At its heart, Engineering Wisdom isn’t about systems or spreadsheets. It’s about people and how we lead them with care, clarity, and courage.

Leadership posture.
Communication mastery.
Empathy in balance with self-care.

These aren’t add-ons or optional extras, they’re the foundation of leadership that endures.

Back to Dave’s quote from the top: Leadership is about how we go together from point A to point B … however long that journey is, however hard it gets. It’s about how we go from here to there.

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It was great having Dave back on the show this week, here’s the link again to hear the conversation in full: https://smartlink.ausha.co/leading-with-integrity/ep-195-effective-communication-leadership-posture-and-engineering-wisdom-with-david-bates-leadership-podcasts

Or if you prefer video in 4K video, then you can also watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/lQhqvQpo_54

Tune in again next week for a chat with corporate spy, consultant, and speaker Jeremy Hurewitz about building rapport (even with people you don’t like), engagement, and leadership lessons from the world of espionage...

Be a Leader Not a Boss,

- David

In case you don’t know me that well, I’m David Hatch and I’m here to help new managers and first-time founders with their leadership skills, so they can become leaders not bosses, lead with integrity, and build happier, higher performing teams, more effective organisations, and, ultimately: successful businesses.

Tackle that imposter syndrome, build confidence as a leader, expand your knowledge of leadership & management, and… Become the leader you wish you’d had, come join my online leadership community. If you have a healthy love of sci-fi and want to learn more about leadership, then this is the community for you. Solopreneurs also welcome. 😉

Here’s the link: Integrity Leaders: Community membership and learning, for new leaders or first-time founders.