Leading with Awareness

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Listen to this week’s podcast episode, Ep.198: Lead Like A Mentalist, Leadership and The Power of Hidden Influence, with Gary Chan, using the player below, or click here.

The Leadership Lessons Hidden in Plain Sight

Some episodes bring a new angle to leadership, others bring a completely different lens. This one does both. This week I sat down with Gary Chan, keynote speaker, cybersecurity leader, and professional mentalist.

Yes, a mentalist. Gary has built a career at the intersection of cybersecurity, psychology, and human behaviour, and he speaks about how to use the principles behind mentalism to build trust, shape culture, and read people more accurately.

At first glance, leadership and mentalism seem worlds apart. But as Gary explains, both rely on the same core skills: observation, curiosity, influence, and understanding how people interpret the world. And when leaders understand those things, everything from communication to decision making becomes easier.

Our conversation explored how leaders can use awareness to create better environments, how influence works beneath the surface, and why fairness does not always mean treating everyone the same. It also showed how much of leadership comes down to noticing what most people miss.

Influence Starts With Awareness

Gary has spent years studying how people think, how they react, and what drives their decisions. He describes leadership as something that begins long before you speak or act, it begins with paying attention.

Most leaders listen for answers, Gary listens for patterns. He notices pauses, energy shifts, discomfort, excitement, and the assumptions people carry into the room. These small signals are the things many leaders overlook, yet they reveal the emotional state of a team far more accurately than a slide deck or a weekly report.

He sees influence not as persuasion, but as understanding. Influence works when people feel safe enough to share what they actually think, not what they believe the leader wants to hear. A leader who pays attention builds that safety much faster than one who rushes through conversations with an agenda already set.

Awareness also helps leaders avoid the trap of assuming everyone thinks the same way. Gary explains that behaviour only makes sense when you understand the meaning an individual person attaches to a situation. If you miss that piece, your view of the problem will be incomplete and so will your response.

People Are Individuals, Not Templates

Gary and I talked about the important idea that fairness is not the same as same…-ness (not sure that’s actually a word but I can’t think of a better one!). What I mean by this is leaders often treat people the same for the sake of consistency, everyone gets the same things at the same times in the same order, etc. But when you’re leading groups of individuals, consistency is not the goal. Effectiveness is. Because each of those individuals has a different context, a different set of experiences, biases, in- and out- of work advantages and challenges.

Gary shared examples from his own leadership practice where two people doing equally strong work needed different things to feel valued. One wanted funded opportunities like conferences, the other needed a payrise. Giving both the same reward would have been simple, but it would also have been ineffective and, most likely, unfair.

Gary encourages leaders to tailor their approach, not because customisation is fancy or fashionable, but because people are driven by different motivations. When you understand what matters to someone, the way you can support them becomes much more powerful.

This approach is not complicated either, it just requires listening, curiosity, and the willingness to be adaptable as a leader. Leaders who treat everyone identically may feel fair, but they often miss the chance to bring out the best in each person.

The Story of the 20 Slide Deck

One of the most practical ideas Gary shared was something he calls his “20 slide management deck.” Whenever a new team member joins him, he walks them through a simple set of slides that explain his expectations, his decision making style, the way he handles mistakes, and how he communicates.

It is his way of taking guesswork out of leadership and it’s such a simple, brilliant idea. I often find myself talking about expectation management, and how crucial those first steps in a new leader-follower relationship can be, and Gary’s here with an immediate win when it comes to addressing that conversation early.

New hires often spend months trying to decode a manager, they try to figure out what matters, what triggers frustration, and where the boundaries are. Gary removes that confusion by being clear from the start. It creates a sense of safety that speeds up trust and reduces unnecessary anxiety.

This is a method leaders at any level can adopt, you don’t need to present slides. You can write a short document, record a video, or even walk through the ideas in a conversation. The point is not the format but the clarity: People do better work when they understand who they are working with.

Reduce the Noise Before You Act

One idea that stood out from our conversation is Gary’s belief that leaders need to focus on the most important factors in any situation and ignore the rest. When you try to consider everything at once, you become overwhelmed. But when you identify the few variables that actually matter, you can make decisions with clarity.

For many new managers, this skill takes time to develop, we try to solve every problem, respond to every signal, and address every concern. Gary encourages a different path: slow down, review the situation, and identify the one or two factors that will make the biggest difference.

Leaders who can reduce noise before responding communicate with more confidence and act with more focus. They also avoid the burnout that comes from treating every issue like a crisis. This is how mentalists think and it’s how effective leaders think too.

Lessons for New Leaders

Here are some ideas from Gary that are worth taking into the rest of your week:

• Start by observing, not assuming.

• Influence grows when people feel safe.

• You cannot lead everyone the same way: Tailor your support to what each person values.

• Clarity is a gift, don’t make your team guess how you lead.

• Ethical influence builds trust, tricks and shortcuts break it.

• Focus on the few things that matter. Let the rest fall away.

• Leadership is easier when you understand how people think.

Final thought? Leadership happens in the small moments

Gary’s message is simple: leadership is the art of understanding people. Not superficially but in a real, thoughtful, human way. The more aware you are of the subtle signals in a room, the easier it becomes to lead with intention.

Mentalists succeed because they see what others miss. Leaders can succeed for the same reason. When you slow down, listen deeply, and notice the details that others overlook, it lets you communicate better, influence more ethically, and start building trust that lasts.

I’ve said this before and will probably say it many times again: Leadership is not about big speeches or bold moves. It’s often found in the quiet moments of connection where someone feels understood. And as Gary shows us; that’s where the real influence lives.

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I hope you enjoy the first of our 4 episodes this week, in celebration of hitting that magic 200th episode milestone! To listen to my conversation with Gary, here’s that link again: https://smartlink.ausha.co/leading-with-integrity/ep-198-lead-like-a-mentalist-leadership-and-the-power-of-hidden-influence-with-gary-chan-leadership-podcasts

Or if you prefer video, then here’s the YouTube link too: https://youtu.be/oT--msf1xAs

Tune in again this Wednesday for a double feature, Episodes 199 and 200! And then again on Friday for episode 201:

• In Ep.199 I’ll be taking a walk down memory lane, revisiting some of my favourite moments on the podcast over the last 4 years, we’ll also hear from you; the audience, and even a few reviews from past guests.

• In Ep.200 I’m really excited about finally introducing you all to one of my biggest mentors in career and life, so don’t miss that.

• And to finish off the week, I’ll be chatting pivot, psychology, and leadership with Dr. Cynthia Bentzen-Mercer, PhD in Ep.201.

A very special line up for a very special week. Hope you enjoy listening, and as always: Be a Leader Not a Boss,

- David

In case you don’t know me that well, I’m David Hatch and I’m here to help new managers and first-time founders with their leadership skills, so they can become leaders not bosses, lead with integrity, and build happier, higher performing teams, more effective organisations, and, ultimately: successful businesses.

Tackle that imposter syndrome, build confidence as a leader, expand your knowledge of leadership & management, and… Become the leader you wish you’d had, come join my online leadership community. If you have a healthy love of sci-fi and want to learn more about leadership, then this is the community for you. Solopreneurs also welcome. 😉

Here’s the link: Integrity Leaders: Community membership and learning, for new leaders or first-time founders.