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Listen to this week’s podcast episode, Ep.217: Expression, Engagement and Execution; the Secret to Leading with Emotional Intelligence, with Kathy Eastwood, using the player below, or click here.

Most leaders don’t struggle because they lack skill, ambition, or intelligence.
They struggle because the human side of leadership feels harder to name, harder to practice, and harder to sustain under pressure.

This week on Leading with Integrity, I’m joined by Kathy Eastwood, founder, consultant, people strategist, and author of The E3 Leadership Code: A Human Approach to High Performance. Our conversation explores what it really takes to lead with emotional intelligence, not as a soft skill or personality trait, but as a set of choices leaders make every day.

At the centre of our discussion is Kathy’s E3 framework: Expression, Engagement, and Execution. Three elements that sound simple on paper, yet reveal just how complex leadership becomes once people, emotions, expectations, and reality collide.

For new managers, growing leaders, and founders building teams around them, this episode offers a way to think about leadership that works with human behaviour rather than against it.

Leadership begins long before a decision is made or a strategy is shared; it starts with what people experience when they are around you.

Expression, as Kathy describes it, is not about charisma or confidence in the traditional sense. It’s about emotional presence, the signals you send through tone, timing, body language, reactions; especially when things aren’t going to plan.

Many leaders assume what matters most is what they say. In reality, people take far more cues from how leaders show up under stress, how they respond to challenge and how safe it feels to speak honestly around them.

In our conversation, Kathy and I explore how easily leaders underestimate this aspect of their role: the terse, short reply, a delayed response, rushed meeting, or a distracted presence can quietly erode trust.

For first-time leaders, this can feel uncomfortable. It asks for awareness before authority, and self management before team management. But it matters because when leaders learn to notice their own emotional signals, they gain choice. Choice about how they respond, how they reset, and how they create conditions where others can contribute fully.

Engagement is often treated as a measurement problem… surveys, scores, dashboards.
Kathy reframes it as a relationship problem instead.

Engagement at/with work grows when people feel seen, heard, and connected to the work they’re doing. It’s not achieved through slogans, painting your values on the walls or offering increasingly complex incentives, but through everyday leadership behaviours that invite participation rather than demanding performance.

During the episode, we talk about how leaders often confuse activity with engagement. Busy calendars, full inboxes, and long hours can give the illusion of commitment, of ‘busyness’, while the reality is people’s energy and ownership are quietly draining away.

Kathy shares how emotionally intelligent leaders take a different approach: They ask better questions, they listen for what is not being said, they create space for contribution without forcing consensus.

This matters deeply for founders and managers who are scaling teams. Engagement cannot be mandated, and it can’t be outsourced. It grows through consistency, clarity, and genuine curiosity about how people experience their work.

One of the most practical takeaways from this part of the conversation is the reminder that engagement starts with leaders being engaged themselves. Engaged with their role, their purpose, and the people around them. Disconnection at the top rarely stays contained to the top…

Execution is where many people assume emotional intelligence stops.

But in real life, this is where it proves its value.

Kathy is clear that emotional intelligence is not about avoiding accountability or lowering standards. It’s about creating the conditions where people can deliver consistently and without fear or confusion, without burnout becoming the not-so-hidden cost.

In our discussion, we explore how emotionally intelligent execution looks different from command and control leadership. Expectations are clear, feedback direct, decisions transparent (explained rather than imposed!). Responsibility is shared, not scattered.

This approach doesn’t remove pressure, but it does change how pressure is experienced. Teams understand why the work matters, how their contribution fits and what support looks like when things become difficult.

For leaders navigating growth, change or uncertainty, this balance becomes critical. Execution without expression and engagement leads to compliance at best, and quiet resistance at worst. Execution built on trust and clarity leads to momentum.

Kathy’s E3 framework shows how these elements reinforce one another, when expression builds trust, engagement deepens commitment and execution becomes sustainable rather than exhausting.

A recurring theme throughout the episode is the idea that leadership is not a role you step into once and master. It’s a practice, a skill. One shaped by self awareness, reflection, and the willingness to adapt.

Kathy shares insights from her work with leaders who care deeply about results, yet recognise that performance and humanity are not opposing forces. (In fact, they depend on one another).

This perspective is especially relevant for leaders early in their journey, who may feel ‘pressure to perform’ certainty before they feel it internally (avoid the trap of “fake it til you make it, bro”).

Emotional intelligence offers another path, where growth, learning and leadership development happen in parallel.

Rather than asking “How do I lead?” the better question becomes “How do I show up?”

Expression, engagement, and execution are not stages to complete but signals to pay attention to.

Leadership is more effective when leaders stop trying to manage people as outputs or resources, and start working with them as humans; with all that entails… imperfect, motivated, thoughtful, and capable of far more than most systems allow.

This conversation with Kathy offers a practical and humane lens for leaders who want to build performance without losing themselves or their teams along the way.

If leadership is about influence, then emotional intelligence is not optional. It’s the medium through which that influence is felt.

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Catch the full episode here: https://smartlink.ausha.co/leading-with-integrity/ep-217-expression-engagement-and-execution-the-secret-to-leading-with-emotional-intelligence-with-kathy-eastwood

Or, if you prefer video, then watch on YouTube (now in glorious 4K!) at: https://youtu.be/110On-gDacA

Hope you’ll be back next week for my conversation about neurodiversity in the workplace with Grant Harris.

Until then, Be a Leader Not a Boss!

- David

In case you don’t know me that well, I’m David Hatch and I’m here to help new managers and first-time founders with their leadership skills, so they can become leaders not bosses, lead with integrity, and build happier, higher performing teams, more effective organisations, and, ultimately: successful businesses.

Turn away from the dark side of management! If you’re a new manager or first-time leader and you’re feeling lonely, stuck, overwhelmed, or simply ready for your next chapter in leadership, the Integrity Leaders Community offers conversations, courses, resources and support to help you grow one step at a time. If you have a healthy love of sci-fi and want to learn more about leadership, then this is the community for you! Solopreneurs also welcome. 😉

Embrace the Light Side of Leadership today, at: Integrity Leaders: Community membership and learning, for new leaders or first-time founders.