How to Build a Team That Goes Beyond “Fitting in”

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Listen to this week’s podcast episode, Ep.179: Leading with Inclusion – the Role of Trust, Diversity, and Leadership in a Modern Workplace, with Delphia Howze, using the player below, or click here.

The Trust Ripple Effect (and Why It Starts With You)

When we talk about inclusion, it often comes wrapped in a tidy acronym: DEI. It sounds official, sometimes corporate, and these days, is often politicised. But if you strip away the buzzwords, what you’re left with is a simple question: does everyone here feel like they belong?

That’s where Delphia Howze comes in. With 20+ years of leadership experience and her new book, Including You: Leading Inclusion From Where You Are, she doesn’t approach the topic from a distance. She brings it right down to the human level; where people lead, work, think, and feel.

Because inclusion isn’t just about policy, it’s about trust.

And without trust, there’s no culture, no creativity, and no performance worth bragging about.

The Real Definition of Diversity (Hint: Ignore the Politics)

During this week’s episode, Delphia makes it clear early on that we’ve done ourselves a disservice by rolling diversity, equity, and inclusion into one convenient acronym without ever agreeing on what any of those words actually mean, or how they apply to the modern workplace.

Diversity, for example, isn’t just about hiring someone from a different demographic group. It’s about recognising the variety of elements people bring into any room; not just race or gender, but life experience, thinking style, communication preference, and yes, even how tall you are (Delphia’s own example).

Inclusion, meanwhile, is the effort to make sure those different elements aren’t just tolerated, they’re actually welcomed and valued. You can have a team full of different people on paper, but if only a handful of voices ever get heard, that’s not inclusion. That’s noise.

So before we can start talking about outcomes, we need a shared language. If you lined up 10 people and asked them to define “inclusion,” you’d probably get 10 different answers. Not because any one is wrong, but because we’ve skipped the step where we get specific.

And without clear definitions, everyone just reverts to their own default (or whatever their favourite news source happens to have said about DEI this week), and that’s a problem. It’s hard to make any idea work among any group of people without starting from a common definition or understanding of the terms.

Inclusion Is Everyone’s Job (Yes, Even Yours)

One of the central ideas Delphia shared, and the basis of her book, is that inclusion isn't just something for HR to handle. Or senior leadership. Or that one person with the DEI title.

Inclusion is everyone's job.

It starts with how you show up, how you listen, how you react when someone shares a different point of view.

And if you're a leader? That responsibility doubles.

Delphia puts it this way: when people feel included, they feel trusted. When there’s trust, there’s psychological safety. And once you’ve got that, the ripple effect kicks in: team engagement improves, people contribute more fully, and innovation becomes possible.

But without that trust? You get silence.
You get performative nodding and withheld ideas.
You get a team that technically works together, but doesn’t grow together.
And that kind of team doesn’t last, certainly won’t succeed.

Vulnerability Isn’t Weakness, It’s the Start of Everything

Delphia shared something she heard often from CEOs during the writing of her book: “I don’t want to say the wrong thing.”

It’s a fear many leaders feel, that one clumsy sentence will undo their credibility, or worse, offend someone. But Delphia flips that fear on its head: the real mistake isn’t saying the wrong thing, but saying nothing.

As a leader, admitting you don’t have all the answers isn’t a liability. It’s a trust builder, that vulnerability isn’t weakness, it’s the beginning of respect. And once your team sees that you’re willing to learn out loud, they’ll feel safer doing the same.

That’s how you get honest conversations instead of quiet compliance. And that’s how you start to build a culture that doesn’t need policies and box-ticking to function with empathy.

Perfection: The Most Dangerous Word in Business?

We also talked about perfection, or more accurately, the damage it causes.

Delphia called out the myth that leaders have to know everything. The truth is, chasing perfection often blocks progress, when you're stuck trying to craft the perfect statement, decision, or hiring choice, you’re not moving; you’re stalling.

Instead, aim for progress. Inclusion is built one moment at a time. One conversation. One decision. One willingness to say, “I’m not sure, can you help me understand?”

It’s a mindset shift. One that leaders, teams, and entire companies need to make if they’re serious about doing better, not just looking better. And the same principles apply to loads of business topics, from leadership to culture, from sales to security.

So, What Can You Actually Do?

If you're a new manager, founder, or just someone who wants to be a more inclusive leader, here are a few things you can start doing today:

• Get clear on definitions. Don’t assume people know what inclusion means; clarify what it looks like in your workplace, and keep talking about it.

• Model curiosity, not certainty. Ask more questions, create space for answers you didn’t expect.

• Make vulnerability visible. Say “I don’t know.” Say “I’d like to learn.” You’ll be surprised how many others do the same.

• Challenge the idea of perfection. Good leadership isn’t flawless. It’s honest, aware, and willing to course-correct.

• Remember: inclusion begins with I, and always needs you. It’s personal, it’s active, and it’s ongoing.

Last Bit…

Delphia’s message is loud and clear: inclusion isn’t about being politically correct or ticking boxes. It’s about recognising our shared humanity, getting out of our own way, and doing the work of seeing and valuing each other fully.

If we can do that, we won’t just build more inclusive workplaces. We’ll build better ones.

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Thanks for reading, be sure to catch the full conversation with Delphia, here’s the link one more time: https://smartlink.ausha.co/leading-with-integrity/ep-179-leading-with-inclusion-the-role-of-trust-diversity-and-leadership-in-a-modern-workplace-with-delphia-howze (or if you prefer video over audio, it’s also on YouTube).

Tune in next week for a conversation about service, purpose, empathy, happiness, influence, and more, with Coach, Trainer, Facilitator, Speaker, Mentor, and Podcast Host: Chris Wilson.

Until then, Be a Leader, Not a Boss.

- David

In case you don’t know me that well, I’m David Hatch and I’m here to help new managers and first-time founders with their leadership skills, so they can become leaders not bosses, lead with integrity, and build happier, higher performing teams, more effective organisations, and, ultimately: successful businesses.

Join Integrity Leaders, my online leadership community (solopreneurs also welcome 😉) where you can participate in live member-only workshops & events, and access an ever growing list of leadership resources including early access to podcast episodes. So if you have a healthy love of sci-fi and want to learn more about leadership, then this is the community for you. Here’s the link:
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