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Listen to this week’s podcast episode, Ep.233: Why Every Leader Needs a Great Network and How to Build One, with Kelly & James West and Kierney Chase, click here to listen now.

When people hear the word "networking", their minds often jump straight to sales conversations, business cards, referral targets, awkward introductions with strangers, or that time I spilled coffee on myself right before a meeting…wait, that last one is probably just me. I properly spilled it too, literally knocked an entire mug over myself…and it was a large mug as well.

Getting back on topic; for many, networking is something that feels transactional, a necessary part of business, but rarely something they look forward to.

This week's conversation on Leading with Integrity offers a very different perspective.

Joining me were Kelly West and James West, co-founders of ONLE Networking, along with ONLE’s Customer Success Manager Kierney Chase. Together, they shared the story behind a business community that has grown significantly over the last eight years, bringing together hundreds of business owners and leaders across the UK, Ireland and the United States.

Today’s conversation quickly became one about relationships, community, learning and the role that connection plays in both leadership and personal growth. It’s a community spirit that I can personally attest to, having been a member of the ONLE network for 5ish years

During all that time I can only remember maybe one or two occasions where I was hit with that ‘pitch and ditch’ mentality by members that didn’t stick around very long, and that’s something else at the heart of ONLE: the best networks aren't built around transactions, they're built around people.

When people come first, opportunities often naturally follow along behind.

People-first, human connection, individual context, people before profits, these are all core values of Leading with Integrity and the way I do business, and they’re well aligned with the way Kelly, James and Kierney do things at ONLE too. One of the reasons networking can have a mixed reputation is because many people approach it with a very specific objective, they want clients, they want referrals, they want business opportunities.

While there’s nothing wrong with those goals, we talked about how focusing exclusively on outcomes can often undermine the very relationships that make those outcomes possible.

Kelly described ONLE as "a business network for people who like people," a simple phrase that captures an important truth and that’s probably why it’s ONLE’s tagline. Business decisions are still made by human beings, trust still matters, relationships are crucial. People are far more likely to work with, collaborate with or recommend individuals they genuinely know and enjoy spending time with.

This may sound obvious, yet many businesses overlook it. They invest heavily in marketing, systems and visibility while neglecting the relationships that so often create the strongest opportunities over time.

Throughout today’s conversation, there was a clear sense that networking works best when it stops feeling like networking. When conversations become more natural, curiosity replaces self-promotion and people spend time understanding one another rather than immediately looking for commercial gain, stronger foundations begin to form.

Those foundations often lead to business opportunities eventually. But they tend to emerge as a consequence of trust rather than as the starting point. For leaders, there’s an important distinction here too; relationships built purely around immediate value are often fragile. Relationships built around genuine connection tend to endure.

Knowing the difference between having a network and belonging to a community is a must. Most business-owners, entrepreneurs, freelancers and leaders today have extensive contact lists. LinkedIn connections can number in the hundreds or thousands. Yet many people still describe feeling isolated, particularly when running a business or stepping into leadership roles.

What Kelly, James and Kierney have worked to create through ONLE is something deeper than a collection of contacts, their focus has been on creating an environment where business owners and leaders can learn together, support one another and navigate challenges alongside people who understand the realities they face.

That sense of shared experience matters, just like leadership can be surprisingly lonely, so can running a business, working as a solopreneur, etc. The higher people progress within organisations, the fewer peers they often have around them, business owners face similar challenges. Decisions carry consequences, uncertainty comes with the territory, not every problem can be discussed openly within a team.

Having access to a trusted network creates a different kind of support system.

Sometimes that support comes through practical advice.

Sometimes it comes through introductions and opportunities.

Sometimes it simply comes from knowing that others have faced similar challenges and found a way through them.

Successful networks don't exist because people need more contacts, they exist because people need meaningful connections.

One of the most thoughtful observations from the episode came from Kierney. Having grown up around networking and business communities from a young age, she reflected on one of the biggest lessons learned along the way: there is something to learn from everyone.

It's a deceptively simple idea, that comes from lived experience and informs the best ways to open conversations, carry a networking room, build those meaningful connections, but also in the leadership sphere, it’s in many ways at the core of great leader behaviours, it required humility, curiosity, listening skills and more.

Many people approach networking with an unconscious filter, they decide who might be useful, influential, successful or relevant before a conversation has even started. In doing so, they often miss opportunities to learn from people whose experiences differ from their own.

Kierney's perspective highlights a more open approach: Every person brings a different story, a different set of experiences, a different way of looking at the world. Sometimes the most valuable insights come from conversations we weren't expecting to have.

The best leaders tend to remain curious regardless of seniority (perceived or otherwise…), they recognise that expertise can emerge from unexpected places and that good ideas and valid opinions aren’t confined to job titles or organisational charts.

When leaders stop assuming they already have the answers, they create space for learning. Networking, at its best, encourages exactly that kind of mindset; it reminds us that every conversation has the potential to teach us something if we're willing to listen.

One of the more personal moments in the conversation came when Kelly reflected on how networking had influenced her life beyond business… After all, networking is how she met James. What began as a professional connection eventually became something much more significant. As Kelly joked, she even managed to spill coffee on him in the early days (there’s a recurring theme about spilled coffee that’s unintentionally crept into this newsletter).

While not everyone will meet their future spouse through a networking group, the story illustrates an important point. Work relationships don’t exist in a separate compartment from the rest of life, people often talk about work-life balance as though business and personal life operate independently. Yet the reality is usually much messier and much more interconnected.

The people we meet through work influence our thinking, our confidence, our opportunities and sometimes our friendships. In many cases, they become part of our wider support network.

Kelly spoke about how some of her closest friendships have come through the ONLE community and that reflects something many leaders eventually discover. The most valuable outcomes from networking are not always the ones we can measure immediately; a referral may help this month, a contract may help this quarter, but a trusted relationship can shape the next decade.

Although networking is often associated with business development, senior leadership levels, founder-owner circles and so on, our chat on the podcast this week repeatedly returned to its relevance for leaders.

Leadership is fundamentally a people-centred activity (at least it is if it’s being done well!!!). The ability to build trust, create relationships, communicate effectively and understand different perspectives sits at the heart of effective leadership.

Strong networks help develop those capabilities, they expose leaders to different industries, different challenges and different ways of thinking. They create opportunities to test ideas, seek advice or support and broaden perspectives beyond the boundaries of a single organisation.

Perhaps most importantly, they remind leaders that they don’t have to navigate every challenge alone. Many leadership mistakes happen in isolation, people become trapped inside their own assumptions because they lack external perspectives that could challenge or refine their thinking. Networks provide those perspectives because they create access to experience.

And experience shared generously is often one of the most valuable resources a leader can have. There’s also a lot to be said for the supportive nature of the right network, and it’s something I truly believe any leader at any stage of their career can benefit from; whether you have a small network of contemporary managers throughout the big company where you work, or a group of a few dozen fellow entrepreneurs.

While referrals, opportunities, commercial success all have their place, the strongest networks are built on relationships rather than transactions. They create communities where people learn from one another, support one another and grow together over time.

For leaders, that lesson feels especially relevant. Building a network isn’t simply a business development activity. It’s an investment in learning, perspective, support, community and connection. The value of which often extends far beyond what can be measured in immediate results.

As my conversation with James, Kelly and Kierney demonstrated, the people we meet through our networks can influence our careers, our confidence, our decision-making and sometimes even the direction of our lives.

The best time to start building those relationships may well have been years ago, the next best time is today.

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Catch the whole episode now on your preferred podcast platform, find the links (or a web-player) here: https://smartlink.ausha.co/leading-with-integrity/ep-233-why-every-leader-needs-a-great-network-and-how-to-build-one-with-kelly-james-west-and-kierney-chase

If you prefer video then you can watch on YouTube too: https://youtu.be/o34I9ZYr7PU

Thanks for reading/listening/watching, check in again next week to hear about my conversation about self-efficacy, the nature of work, leadership and fishing with Dr Mickey Fitch-Collins.

You might be tired of reading this closing paragraph because it’s getting repetitive, but I think it’s important to keep saying it anyway: THANK YOU for reading, for listening, for supporting Leading with Integrity. There’s no show, no newsletter, no future of leadership without each of you.

Be a Leader Not a Boss,

- David

In case you don’t know me that well, I’m David Hatch and I’m here for new managers and first-time founders working in tech or specialist driven teams to help with their leadership skills, so they can become leaders not bosses, lead with integrity, and build happier, higher performing teams, more effective organisations, and, ultimately: successful teams.

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